Since last night I'd been down

I'd been down for almost no reason.

Every single small bad thing irritated me, disappointed me, and depressed me.
Even tho I had a cup of coffee at my favorite cafe my heart sunk deeply and I felt hopeless.

I know I don't have much money...
but how could I manage my tough but boring life without doing what I like to do?
I don't wanna be deeply depressed and go to see school counseler every week again!
That was terrible experience for me, and I'm just trying to make myself happy... just as same as you drink everyday, dad.

I wanted to say so to my parents but I couldn't.
I know I'm living with their money.
I know I don't earn enough to live by myself.
I know I'm wasting their money on everything.
Maybe I should kill myself then they will be happy cuz they gonna save their money, huh.

But wasn't that you, who told me not to have any part time job during school years, dad.....

Oh yeah it's all my fault
I didn't take the teaching course when I was freshman.
I didn't think about my future carefully before goin to the States.
I didn't listen to my mom saying I should have got a part time job.




Today I went to school with deep depression
and she found it out

She tried to cheer me up
usually it doesn't work on me but this time it did

She said to us:

"When you get some lemons, make lemonade!"


Thru the whole class I was smiling
She brought me my Smiling Face back.


She's the one who told me life is just beautiful

At first I didn't like her;
she was too bright for me


Now she's like my mom telling me how to live better & happier
Finally I like her so much

After the class I told her "I became a little bit Genki now"
and she said she was glad to see her student's become Genki after her class.


I'm still a bit down, but I will be okay soon hopefully,
because I have such a nice teacher in my skool life
and I want to be like her someday in the future.


I will make it. I sure will make it.